Barbara’s family life is a counter-cultural witness in North Africa

In their community, it’s important to visit families soon after a death. Because Barbara does not have anyone who can babysit, they often take their young children with them. The first time they did so, Barbara worried that bringing toddlers into a house of mourning would be inappropriate. 

“We want to reflect what a family looks like where the family is focused on God, serving him and serving each other.”

Instead, she has found that “having our children with us has opened opportunities to talk with other parents and to bring some joy and some hope in those moments of grief.” 

At these visits, men and women mourn separately, following local custom. While her husband sat with the male relatives, Barbara found herself in a room full of women she had only just met. Their children helped break the ice, leading to conversations and connections that might not otherwise have happened. 

“It’s been unexpected to me how our family can be a real blessing in those situations,” she says. “Particularly to our children. It’s been quite beautiful.” 

The visits have shown her that family can open doors to conversations about life, death and the gospel. Connecting with other women in these moments has also made her more aware of a need much closer to home. 

Unlike many places in the world where mothers gather through playgroups, parks or children’s activities, there are few opportunities for connection.  

“It’s not a culture where people go out with children,” she explains. “Mothers often return to work while their babies are still very young, and grandparents care for children at home. There are no parks, so there’s nowhere like that to go and mingle with other mums.” 

Despite this, she has built one-to-one friendships with women in her neighbourhood, and through those conversations she has realised that many local women feel the same loneliness. That realisation has given her a vision for ministry in this season of life. 

“That’s really my hope and my prayer, that I can start a mother’s group for local women” she says. 

In a context with so few spaces for mothers to gather, a group like this would create opportunities for friendship, community, and conversations about faith. 

“I wish I’d known earlier about the beautiful, unexpected side of family life. How having children creates even greater opportunities for ministry.”

Looking at her life now, she says her ministry may seem smaller on paper than it once did. There are fewer official roles or measurable outcomes. But she no longer sees ministry or impact that way. Her main ministry, she says, is now her home and her children. 

When she was single, she would look at families in mission work and think how hard it all seemed.  

She says, “I wish I’d known the really beautiful, positive side, where there are greater opportunities because of kids, because of being a family. 

“Maybe on paper, my ministry output is far less. But it’s not in the eyes of the Lord.”

*Names have been changed.