The past three months have brought an incredible amount of change to my daily functioning and responsibilies in South Sudan. I want to make you aware that things are changing yet again—I wish I could report that they are good changes. Over the past few months there has been increasing conflict within 30 to 60 kms north of us.

Until recently this conflict has not affected us and we’ve been feeling safe, even though we are close in proximity (relatively speaking). On Tuesday evening, fighting occurred closer to the SIM base, south of the border, resulting in loss of life and many injured. This resulted in the evacuation of half the team from our Doro base.

There are five of us remaining in Doro and we praise and thank the Lord who's Hand of Protection is over all areas of these unfortunate circumstances. We have remained to close the base and to downgrade our clinic to a status that our five Mabaan Community Health Workers can maintain on their own.

Having this extra time has given us opportunity to say goodbyes, write letters to the Commissioner, communicate with our Sudanese Church partners here, and continue to monitor the situation.

As I'm sure you can imagine all these things are hard to wrap one's head around. Before I left to come to Sudan I had two big fears:

1. that one of my grandparents would pass away while I was here and
2. that I would have to leave for safety while the people I have come to love are left (abandoned, is what it feels like) to the danger approaching.

The first happened during my first year on the field, and by God's Grace, the latter is only happening now for the first time for me. Yesterday while I was paying our staff I had to hold back tears numerous times as the concerned looks on our friends' faces brought in floods of guilt, concern, love, and oddly enough, joy. I can hardly describe to you what a JOY it is to be a part of these people’s lives. Two of our guards gave me a speech yesterday about God's sovereignty, protection, and faithfulness. I have learned SO much from the resilient hearts of God's people here in South Sudan.

Since yesterday when we started telling people that we were leaving, Tabita, our cook, along with much of the community have 'stuck pretty close'. While they are happy for us to go and be safe, the act of our leaving causes them pain—our absence feels like a 'hole' in the village and unfortunately reaffirms their fears that the situation is not improving, just the opposite, in fact. I was sitting here working on my computer and Tabita came in, got some water and plunked herself down for a visit—she doesn't normally do this! We talked about our going, their staying, the injured people in Guffa where the bombs fell on our side of the border. She reminisced about times in Khartoum where she 'waited out' the last war for 21 years; and we did all this talking over a bowl of pudding I had left in the fridge. :) It's precisely these sweet, random, friend-moments that make our going hard to bear.

Why should I get to fly away to safety when Tabita has to face the reality of running to the bush yet again in her life? One very large part of me would choose to stay and 'run to the bush' with them, but that part is at war with my other part which is also eager for personal safety. There is nothing easy about these circumstances. The only thing that helps is knowing that the choice is not left up to me - and that is a blessing.)

I know it's stating the obvious, but please keep praying for us—for our goodbyes over the next days and for ongoing safety, but even more so please pray for the people of South Sudan. Pray that they will not have to run for their lives once more. For those on the northern side of the border, may the Lord protect them and keep them amidst the tragedy happening there on a daily basis. There is so much heart ache in our world, but most of us know the only One who is the repairer of broken hearts (Isaiah 61:1-6). Let’s keep this WHOLE situation lifted up to HIM.

Thank you for walking along beside us, upholding us in prayer, and supporting the Body of Christ in South Sudan.

Joyfully in His Service,

Katta/Christiane